Women – How well do we know those closest to us? Bill Frost was brave, charming, talented and mixed up in a murky world. Five years after his death, his sister is still discovering the truth
'Cocaine stole my brother'
SORRY, Cocaine does NOTHING by Itself??????
To All the COKE Heads Enjoy.........
I did, for a while. It isn't hard to explain the eroding of love for anyone or anything else life has to offer when one gets strung out. It just happens. I don't know anyone who intended to become an addict, and I know a lot of addicts.
First it's a thrill. Kind of like walking around with acute sexual arousal that just won't stop. Then it's a routine, easily managed by the most novice at multitasking. The 'bumps' get bigger because the thrill ebbs quicker. A little more skill is required at juggling the job, bills, relationships, social commitments etc. This slow spiral starts to gain momentum over time. Eventually the dope is the only thing that matters, and you wonder how you got there. Insideous!
I've known prostitutes that were the biggest Bible thumpers you ever met, even while smoking coke. Known wealthy people that lost everything. Buried a few too. Ran with gangsters and high rollers, bums and business professionals, and people that work for the state.
Sat at home and watched police chases on TV only to have the fugitive show up at my door. Had big time users that owed me money tell me I needed rehab.
I wouldn't have listened to Jesus and all of the angels if they knocked on my door. I wouldn't have opened it. This cat was sitting in my living room because he owed me money.
Did some power out there know how to get to me? Don't know.
i haven't used anything stronger than nicotine or caffeine in eight years, and don't have any plans to, today.
Hobe, good for you.You haven't found a reason to yet.
I believe yet stands for: You're Eligible Too. Good luck!
Great posts SD!
I commend your willingness to share your story and I imagine that it also helps you to do so [?]
I've known lots of people go the way of coke, some of the best and brightest.
Its a horrible feeling when you discover that someone cannot be your friend any more because their only friend is a white powder - or a pipe - and there is no way to dissuade them or persuade them that anything is more important.
Its more dangerous than alcohol because people stay very functional much longer and its not as obvious until you find a little trace of powder on a mirror or you notice that overly frequent visits to the bathroom are followed by changed behaviour.
I was lucky that I never liked it.
Many people tend to look at victims and perpetrators.
The fact is, the user perpetrates a crime on himself. Addiction is classified as a disease and if any are contentious, I won't argue with you. If you saw "Goodfellas", and said, "that guy is nuts"! You've made my point. We call these war stories. Some stories are so insane they're the stuff of farcical comedy, and I don't mind sharing them. Others are cruel jokes.In the former and the latter, Ive been the butt of every one of them. Anyway, some insight has been gained, and the education has been expensive. I always liked to think that I was one of the 'good guys'. Imagine that! LOL
Solved the riddles of the Universe while stoned. Then forgot every bit of it. I just know I was right though.
Smell is subjective.
Riddles of the universe- yeah I know what you mean -one time I was taking this Astronomy course and I was sitting around one night just thinking about this stuff when all of a sudden,I had this notion that I had solved one of the mysteries of the universe, and like you the next morning it was gone, but boy the night before it sure seemed real.
I know of the coaxing, and the pleading. I know of having to physically restrain and nurse and watch. My last girlfriend went the way of Meth. I know the resounding and echoing effects of being close to someone who is addicted. Coming home from work to a room full of strangers.I had to end it after two years to keep my sanity. There are far reaching effects to these things, and it lingers.
I know people who do this in their 50s and 60s. While most seem a few cents short of a penny. There are a few who actually seem to get a lot done. Some have a better memory than I do. I wonder why this is so?
My last boyfriend spent his whole life crashing. I don't call that much of a high. I could tell anytime he did the stuff the house would be clean but never good enough.
This is very sad. I also have a family member who was lost to alcohol and drugs--a brilliant man who also was able to hide it from everyone, so no one even suspected until one day a similarly horrific event uncovered the truth. My heart goes out to this lady. Beloved family members and friends can truly break your heart without warning. You lead separate lives and only hear what they tell you. Very sad.
I sympathize with the writer of this article. My brother has a huge coke problem. Until recently, I'd call him a functional coke addict. He's a sucessful professional who is now spiraling out of control. Nothing I say or do seems to make any difference. It's as if he thinks he's invinceable.
I just don't understand how people get so into coke. I've done it on a few occations and absolutly hated it. It's an evil, evil drug. I fully support the war on the drugs like these.
Coke is an acquired taste.
Some researchers suggest that people prone to addiction gravitate toward a 'balancing drug'. This at the outset would be one that might compensate a personality need. Stimulants/ more aggressive, depressants/more passive. Might be a grain of truth to that theory in some cases.
I don't know if it is the stimulant/ deppressant connection or the feeling you get at the time of active use. I know when I was in my 20"s I used to drink more in social situations because I was too much of an introvert- uncomfortable in my own skin I guess; definitely used it as a "personality compensator" as you said.
What ever happened to personal responsibility?
Exactly! I'm not like them! I pay my bills, etc., etc.
Addicts lie to themselves all of the time. It's called denial.
Most of the people I associate with that used to use are now very responsible, admitting their part in their addiction.
No one forced me to use. Some have been forced or seduced, but that is rare.
I dont feel sorry for drug addicts they made their own choice to do drugs so they can get high, I have 1 dead brother cause of crack cocaine that was a total thief and bullied people and have another brother that does an assortment of drugs and he works and steals to support his habits of choice and I know many other people that does drugs that may call me their friend but I let them know Im not friends with any no good drug addict, I will not give or loan money to them and they can not come to my home for any reason
I think people are different as the type of addictions they choose. I think people who like coke also enjoy painkillers.
I do not agree when people say they do not know someone is on a drug. The simplist clue is they often make promises they do not keep. Look in everyone's pockets when they do not know you are around you will find short straws. Also, razor blades laying in the house. They will usually lie and say they use them to shave. No one has used that kind of a blade for years.
A lot of people do not crash.
My only help for my other brother is tough love and Im very very cold hearted toward drug addicts, my only way of helping him would be to chop off his thieving hands or turn him into the law if I ever seen any drugs in his posession and just hope he would get years of prison to straighten him out
Has your family tried an intervention? Tough love is good. Calling the police, in my opinion isn't the kind of tough love that helps. That may turn him even further away from his family and pull him even deeper into it. Like I said earlier, I went through this. I fought a cocaine addiction. It was bad. What helped me was my family and friends. They didn't call the police. They simply showed me that I was loved and showed me the way towards sobriety. Ultimately, it was up to me to realize the destructive road I was on and what it was doing to the people who cared about me. That, in-it-self allowed me to wake up. The turning point was me finally realizing that I was going to die if I continued. Me dying would hurt my loved ones more than it would me at the time. I didn't want them to suffer. So I quit....and now I'm a better man because of it and getting better everyday I'm off it.
Just wanted to give you hope that you yourself can help just by being there for him.
If I could do it, and I was in bad shape, your brother can do it.
Every chance I have to help someone in this regards I do it. I feel like I had a second chance. Your brother deserves one too.
Sorry about your other brother. I lost friends to this drug too. All the best man. Just be there for him. Talk. Be the sensible voice in his life. Show him he's loved and quitting is achievable.
Peace.
My best friend or was my best friend just started to do coke. He moved to new york at the end of june after we graduated. He was gone for about two weeks and we had planned a vacation in the bahamas. He never did coke and barely knew anything about it. Well once we were in the bahamas he went out and found some and he knew everything about it in those two weeks he was gone. He was fiendin the whole vacation spending endless money on it. After the vacation I went back to jersey and for the next few days I was receiving calls from 2-8am in the morning him telling me how good he feels and how he hasnt been asleep for 2-3 days. Let alone I couldn't understand one word that left his mouth since he was talking so fast. Screw this drug alright. That ain't normal. Weed is all I need.
Schillinfl1
..OH..THAT GOES FOR YOU TOO - just read your comment. Beautiful adivce.
I have a brother on crack. I help him when I can - but I refuse to be an enabler - I will not help him to be comfortable with his addiction...sometimes this causes friction between us, but I just let him know that he's still my brother and I will always love him.
For example, he works and his car broke down and he needed help getting it fix. I could tell that he wanted me to put the money in his hands (and he never would've gotten the car fix, would've lost his job, etc), but I wouldn't. I told him to meet me at the auto repair place and I'd help him out. The only reason I helped is because he needs his car to get to work. Yes, he is a functioning addict, but I feel eventually, he will hit rock bottom and face the music.
Thanks. I feel like if I share my experience, maybe it can help someone or guide someone else to help someone else.
It takes time....but stay with him. It took me over a year AFTER I wanted to quit to actually quit.
For me it was different. I too functioned. I'm an athlete and I was even able to continue playing sports at a pretty high level. I worked. I make great money so nobody had to support me. If I wanted coke, I'd get it. Did it 3-4X a week in large quantities. That was never a problem for me. What shook me was the amount of support I got. I didn't quantify my own life. My family and friends did that for me.....and it took time to realize it. Now? Bigger, stronger, smarter, and better than ever. Sometimes in life, you need go through big adversity to be a better person. In a weird way, i'm kind of glad I went through it. ....it helped me become who I am and it still shapes me.
Hang in there with your bro. He may have to really sink to wake up.
Good luck!
"Sometimes in life, you need go through big adversity to be a better person. In a weird way, i'm kind of glad I went through it. ....it helped me become who I am and it still shapes me."
I really believe that this is true, schillin..It amazes me how people are able to be "functioning " addicts and be able to continue with their regular routines, and in your case even play sports.
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From the bottom of my heart, I believe we always know what's going on, but we don't want to see ( to have peace, for our own tranquillity, and above all to avoid quarrels..)
It is not very courageous, but it's true